Tuesday, October 4, 2011

The meaning of “Bad statements are for bad people (or bad women for bad men) and bad people for bad statements (or bad men for bad women)”; and is it possible to find a wife who is righteous both outwardly and inwardly?

 

I wrote this message after I read an essay. In its end a situation was mentioned: Al-laalkaa’e narrated that when a man mentioned A’yesha, may Allah be pleased with her, in a bad manner in Al-hasan ben zaid’s presence, he ordered to kill this man by sword. The Alwiyyoun said: he is one of our group. So Al-hasan said: “we seek refuge with Allah from this, this man slandered the prophet, peace be upon him. Allah Almighty says (interpretation of the meaning): “Bad statements are for bad people (or bad women for bad men) and bad people for bad statements (or bad men for bad women). Good statements are for good people (or good women for good men) and good people for good statements (or good men for good women) such are innocent of that which people say: For them is pardon and a bountiful provision”

 
So if A’yesha may Allah be pleased with her is a bad woman then the prophet, peace be upon him is also bad. Thus, this man is infidel; kill him by sword, so they killed him.  

 
What is the explanation of this verse “Bad statements are for bad people (or bad women for bad men) and bad people for bad statements (or bad men for bad women). Good statements are for good people (or good women for good men) and good people for good statements (or good men for good women) such are innocent of that which people say: For them is pardon and a bountiful provision”

 
I had a personal experiment myself; I married a girl who I though is religious, my aim was to establish a righteous Muslim home in which I try my best to follow the approach of our honourable prophet, peace be upon him, and his companions. In brief, I did not ask about her very well before marriage, I found her to be very vile. May Allah forgive her and me. Most of her talk was lies and tricks. I did not feel she has any passion for Islam or for righteousness. I divorced her after I knew she is not going to change herself, we have one child.


I love Islam too much and I love anyone I feel he is religious, and I have strong hatred to those who are immoral especially if they insist on sinning or announce their sins.

 
My marriage and divorce experiment was the bitterest I had in my life. I now fear I repeat the bitter experience again. I wish to find who will help me be more religious. How can I be assured while people are content to show opposite of who they really are? Especially when it comes to such matters as marriage.

 
Before I married that woman I prayed istikhara many times and consulted Allah, I was sometimes crying and asking Allah to guide me, especially when I see bad signs from her side or from her family that indicates they are not religious people.

 
I am not trying to say it is not my fault, or to show myself as the better one in this relationship. By I love Islam, by Allah, and am very jealous for Islam, and I hate lying strongly. Briefly, I do not think it is in my hands to get the right one even if I ask very well and collect information about the girl or try to test her personality before marriage. Unless if Allah has mercy on me and blesses me with giving me a righteous wife.  


Marriage nowadays became very difficult. I, by Allah, think it is of the most difficult matters, and the most difficult part of it is finding a moral and religious wife. I think it is impossible unless Allah permits. When I read or hear the mentioned verse, I feel very sad; does it mean that I chose my previous wife because I deserve this? I know it is a test from Allah, but I want to have a clear explanation of the verse and, if possible, the rest of my queries.

Praise be to Allaah.

Firstly: 

The
mufassireen differed concerning the meaning of the verse (interpretation of
the meaning):  

“Bad
statements are for bad people (or bad women for bad men) and bad people for
bad statements (or bad men for bad women)”

[al-Noor
24:26] 

Some of them
said that it refers to bad and good words, so the meaning of the verse is:
Evil words are for evil men, and evil people are for evil words, and good
words are for good people, and good people are for good words. 

Others said
that it refers to evil and good actions. So the meaning of the verse is:
Evil actions are for evil men, and evil people are for evil actions, and
good actions are for good people, and good people are for good actions. 

The third
opinion concerning this verse is that evil and good refer to people with
regard to marriage. So the meaning of the verse is: evil women are for evil
men, and evil men are for evil women, and good women are for good men, and
good men are for good women. 

There is no
reason why the verse cannot be understood in all these senses, although the
most obvious meaning is the first one mentioned, and this is the opinion of
the majority of mufassireen. The second view comes next. 

Shaykh ‘Abd
al-Rahmaan al-Sa’di (may Allaah have mercy on him) said:  

“Bad
statements are for bad people (or bad women for bad men) and bad people for
bad statements (or bad men for bad women)”
means all evil men, women, words and actions that are fit for evil and in
accordance with it or accompanied by it and in harmony with it, and all good
men, women, words and actions that are fit for good and in accordance with
it or accompanied by it and in harmony with it. This explanation is general
in meaning and nothing is excluded from that. One of the greatest
application of this is that with regard to the Prophets – especially the
Messengers of strong will, and especially their leader, Muhammad (peace
and blessings of Allaah be upon him), who is the best among all the good of
creation – only the best of women are suitable for them. So the one who
slanders ‘Aa’ishah (may Allaah be pleased with her) in this manner is
slandering the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him),
which was the aim of the slander (al-ifk) fabricated by the
hypocrites. The mere fact that she was the wife of the Messenger (peace
and blessings of Allaah be upon him) confirms that she was nothing but good
and pure and innocent of these reprehensible matters. 

So how about
when she is the siddeeqah of women, the best, most knowledgeable and purest
of them, the beloved of the Messenger of the Lord of the Worlds? Revelation
did not come down to him when he was under the same cover as any of his
wives except her. Then the verse states clearly, so that there will be no
opportunity for any propagator of falsehood to say anything and no room for
any doubt whatsoever:  

“such (good
people) are innocent of (every) bad
statement which they say”

[al-Noor
24:26] 

The reference
is primarily to ‘Aa’ishah, and then to the believing chaste women. 

“for
them is forgiveness” [al-Noor 24:26]

meaning,
forgiveness for all of their sins. 

“and
Rizqun Kareem (generous provision, i.e. Paradise)”
i.e., in Paradise, coming from the Generous Lord. 

Tafseer
al-Sa’di
(p. 563). 

Secondly: 

What you have
quoted about the killing of a man who slandered ‘Aa’ishah (may Allaah be
pleased with her) is true. This is what the Muslim rulers should do, which
is to execute everyone who slanders ‘Aa’ishah (may Allaah be pleased with
her), because impugning the honour of ‘Aa’ishah is disbelief in the Qur’aan,
and impugning the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him).
Either of these actions implies kufr which puts a person beyond the pale of
Islam, and the one who does it deserves to be executed for apostasy. 

In
al-Mawsoo’ah al-Fiqhiyyah (22/185) it says: 

The fuqaha’
are unanimously agreed that the one who slanders ‘Aa'ishah (may Allaah be
pleased with her) has disbelieved the clear, unambiguous statement of the
Qur’aan that was revealed concerning her, and hence he is a kaafir. Allaah
says – in the hadeeth of the slander (al-ifk), after Allaah declared that
she was innocent – “Allaah forbids you from it and warns you not to
repeat the like of it forever, if you are believers” [al-Noor 24:18]. So
the one who goes back to that is not a believer. 

Are all the
other wives of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him)
regarded as being like her? 

The Hanafis
and the Hanbalis, according to the correct opinion, which was favoured by
Ibn Taymiyah, say that they are all like her. They quoted as evidence the
verse in which Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning): 

“Bad
statements are for bad people (or bad women for bad men) and bad people for
bad statements (or bad men for bad women). Good statements are for good
people (or good women for good men) and good people for good statements (or
good men for good women): such (good people) are innocent of (every) bad
statement which they say; for them is forgiveness, and Rizqun Kareem
(generous provision, i.e. Paradise)”

[ al-Noor
24:26] 

Slandering
them implies slander of the Messenger (peace and blessings of Allaah be
upon him) and impugning his honour, which is forbidden. 

The other
view, which is that of the Shaafa’is and the other view of the Hanbalis, is
that they – apart from ‘Aa’ishah – are like the rest of the Sahaabah; the
one who reviles them is to be flogged, because he is a slanderer. End
quote. 

Shaykh
Muhammad ibn Saalih al-‘Uthaymeen (may Allaah have mercy on him) said: 

Slandering
‘Aa’ishah with regard to that of which Allaah has declared her innocent is
kufr, because it is disbelieving the Qur’aan. With regard to slandering
other wives of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him)
there are two scholarly opinions, the sounder of which is that it is kufr,
because it is a slander against the Prophet (peace and blessings of
Allaah be upon him), because “Bad statements are for bad people (or bad
women for bad men).”  

Majmoo’
Fataawa al-Shaykh Ibn ‘Uthaymeen
(5/p.86) 

See also the
answer to question no. 954. 

Thirdly:

It was
narrated from Abu Hurayrah (may Allaah be pleased with him) that the Prophet
(peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Women may be married
for four things: their wealth, their lineage, their beauty and their
religious commitment. Choose the one who is religiously-committed, may your
hands be rubbed with dust (i.e., may you prosper).” Narrated by al-Bukhaari,
5090; Muslim, 1466. 

It is not
impossible for a man to find a righteous wife who will help him to obey
Allaah, serve him, raise his children, and look after his wealth and house.
The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) advised men to
marry the woman who is religiously committed. If it were not possible or
within a man’s capability to find that religiously committed woman, the
Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) would not have
advised him to marry her. He is the one who said in the same hadeeth that
some men marry women for their beauty, and some marry them for their lineage
or their wealth. Men choose women according to their own desires and
traditions and customs, but his advice to all men is to look for the woman
who is religiously committed and marry them, because in marrying such a
woman there is a great deal of good which the man will see in himself, his
house and his children. 

You should not
give up hope of finding a woman who is religiously committed and of good
character. The Muslim ummah is still doing well and there are still Muslim
families which are raising women who are of good character and committed to
Islam, and are brought up in this manner. 

The failure of
one experience of marriage does not mean that the same will happen to all
subsequent marriages. What happened to you may have been a punishment to you
because of your shortcomings in asking and finding out about the woman whom
you married. 

People know
one another and mix with one another, so the state of a family and its
members will not be hidden from their relatives and neighbours. The members
of the family mix with people in the mosque and school and when visiting
people, so a righteous woman will be known and distinguished from the
opposite, and the religiously committed man will be known and distinguished
from his opposite, by their adhering to regular prayer, and adherence to
outward shar’i laws, and their attitude in dealing with others. What one of
them hides inwardly is something that no one can know, and the one who is
deceived by outward righteousness when a person is inwardly corrupt is not
to be blamed, because our Lord does not require us to look at what is hidden
inside people. 

Moreover, what
is applicable to the women among whom you are looking for a life partner is
also applicable to you. How do people know who you really are, or what you
are like inwardly? Guardians have been advised to give their female
relatives in marriage to men who are religiously committed and of good
character, based on what they can see, as well as asking and finding out
from the relatives of the suitor. Whatever wrong impressions and deceit may
happen on the part of the woman may also happen – and more so – on the part
of the man. So you should not be anxious or worry because of your first
marriage. All you have to do now is look carefully, and ask good people
about good families who raise their daughters to obey Allaah and with good
morals and attitudes. Then you can focus your questions about the one whom
you want to marry from those families, by asking her friends and classmates
about her commitment and righteousness, and about her attitude and
interactions with others. Thus you will have followed the advice of the
Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him), and we hope that
you will not be disappointed by her and that they will not be disappointed
by you. 

We ask Allaah
to help you to make a good choice and to bless you with a righteous wife who
will keep you chaste and you will keep her chaste, and you will treat her
well and she will treat you well, and to bless you with good and righteous 
children. 

For more
information on the qualities to be sought in the wife, please see the
answers to questions no. 26744 and
10376. 

And Allaah is
the Source of strength.

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